Sunday, February 19, 2006

Bean Cult-ure

i'm on to you starbucks! you tried to suck me in, but i'm too swift for your cheap trickery!

i'm at starbucks after work yesterday because that's where my carpool goes. i'm not the driver, so i go along every week and get a brownie and some water. i've never been a coffee man. i'm just not impressed.

first of all, i don't really like warm beverages at all. hot chocolate is ok. but coffee is mostly too bitter. i know you can sweeten it and everything, but if i do drink it i usually need to put so much sugar in it, just to make it palatable, that it's basically like hot chocolate anyway.

so, today, i was enjoying what i ordered when one of the servers brings around free samples of their new "marble mocha macchiato". i took one, hesitatingly. i mean, i didn't think i would possibly like it's free. so i took a sip..."damn, this is pretty good!" another sip followed..."wow, must drink more."

i downed that sample cup pretty quick and wanted...MORE! i could barely contain myself. i was buzzed. it was all i could do to stop myself from buying a cup. but i did stop myself.

don't you try it again starbucks. you tried once, and it was a noble effort. "marble mocha macchiato"'s coffee! but you're not gonna get me!

Saturday, February 04, 2006

Refusal to Deliver

alright canada post, we've got a beef to settle, you & me! you're starting to piss me off now!

alright johnny, let's be fair. you can't blame an entire company for the shortcomings of one employee. one very lazy-ass employee.

where i live, it's been snowing...a lot. as a matter of fact it doesn't really seem to stop for all that long. we've had a mild winter. apparently, the milder the winter the more snow you get. so guess what. i don't even bother with the stuff anymore. there's no point in shovelling. it would be like mopping the floor in a bathroom at that woodstock revival they had in the 90s. in other words, completely useless because the more you get rid of the snow on areas where people like to walk, the more snow that falls.

so lately i've simply done all that i could do to make sure there was a path on the front walk that's about a foot across. a foot is plenty wide enough to have room to walk on. there's no problem here...

so here's where i get to the point. the last couple of days we haven't gotten any mail. i'm talking 2...3 days in a row. that never happens. so my wife pointed out what's happening here. the mail delivery person is refusing to deliver because the space on our walk is too narrow. what the hell?!

too narrow!!?!?! damn lazy mail person! your stupid union empowers you to the point where you look for the smallest excuse not to do your damn job. guess what? you're on the mail route anyway, walking by our house. just deliver the stupid mail because you get paid to do it.

so people say to me when i complain about this, "hey, how dare you be so brash as to call the mail deliver person lazy when you won't even clean your front walk?" and that's a valid point...except that I don't get paid to clean my front walk. the canada post person does get paid to deliver mail.

so just get the job done and there won't be a problem!