Saturday, October 16, 2004

let's not "should" this guy to death

hi! long time no rant. well, that's happened for 2 reasons. 1) it's been really busy at work lately and, yada yada, i'm really tired. 2) nothing really pissed me off enough to write about...until yesterday.

i heard someone say something that i've heard before, and i realized how much it gets to me. it strikes me as being incredibly arrogant and ridiculously exclusionary. apparently, if you don't have kids you have nothing valid to say about the institution or practice of parenting.

try to stay with me on this one. a local radio talk show host was introducing an upcoming segment and basically inserted a disclaimer before making a statement about parenting. it was something to the effect of, "now, i'm not a parent, but apparently a recent poll demonstrated that a lot of parents spend less than 10 minutes per day helping their child(ren) with homework." a co-worker, without missing a beat, quickly blurted out, "until you're a parent, you've got nothing to say."

i've heard this before. would people who say these kinds of things honestly have us believe that one day they were stupid about parenting and the next day...child is born and bada-bing they have all these valid ideas about parenting? what is it that makes people say things like that?! are they concerned that when other, non-parent, people have valid thing to say about how certain parenting tasks should be performed that the parent people will be made to look stupid?

no one's trying to "dethrone" parents. drop your pride. believe it or not, good parenting ideas can be had by people who aren't parents. in fact...yeah, i would venture to say that there are even times when better parenting ideas are had by people who aren't parents because they're removed from the emotional attachment that many parents have to their kids that affects their judgement.

so guess what? parents who spend less than 10 minutes a day with their child on their child's homework aren't spending enough time. now, some of you might say, "but johnny, some parents are too busy working and providing to spend much time with their kids at all, never mind on homework."

i have a few things to say about that (surprise!). these aren't value judgements. i'm not saying any of the offenders are "bad parents". so take the knots out of your unmentionables and listen up! 1) you should have thought about that before you had or adopted a child. 2) you can't honestly expect me to believe that, out of an evening comprised of a total of 4 hours you can't find 30 minutes-1 hour to spend with your child on homework. no, this still may not be all your child needs, but it's a start. and, finally, 3) deal with it!

my name is johnny and i am not a parent!


Blogger youtoo said...

I agree with ya preacha. I don't have kids. I should rephrase that I don't have kids of my own. Oh wait. Yes I do. I have 20 or so. Let me try again. I don't have biological kids of my own. Neverthe less I think I know a lot of about kids, teens and how to deal with them. After all as a teacher I spend more time with kids than their parents do. I have also worked with kids with special needs, of all social economic status, intelligence and behaviour and skill sets. I have lived with kids 24 hours a day. When I'm with kids I am with a group of them and see them the way they act away from thier "parents". If anything, beacause of the wide range of kids I have "parented" my opinon on parenteing as a childless man should be given more weight than some parents with kids.

10/19/2004 8:23 PM  

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